Sunday, February 10, 2013

REACH DOWN, GRAB A ROOT AND GROWL

On January 21, 2013, I  was officially diagnosed with stage IV pancreatic cancer, invading from my pancreas into my liver. I have been going to the City of Hope since 2007 fighting throat cancer with great success...I might add. But even their great surgical staff had to grimace when they gave me this news. Shit house odds beating this one was written in their eyes...but If you do stick with this journey you will find that I have been told that story more than once in my life. In fact I've been told that several times, and that's where the mental toughness "reach down grab a root and growl" helps me to over come adversities.

This is Not a pity party so please don't do that. If you choose to follow along, and even respond, understand that this is therapy for me. However, I can only hope that in some small measure I can make a positive difference for someone out there that may be suffering and feeling hopelessness.

 My lifestyle, my environment were some reasons doctors gave for why people get pancreatic cancer. Can't say I would disagree with their analysis, since I worked in a high stress environment as a federal undercover agent for 13 straight years. I laundered millions and millions of dollars for the old infamous Pablo Escobar drug cartel. My experiences all began in the days of the Cocaine Cowboys, originating out of Miami in the early 80s and continued through my retirement in 1994. I loved my daily bottle of scotch and my three packs of smokes; and the stress that I had learned to cope with, kept my weight down. I was happy living that rich life style of a dirty money-laundering banker with fast cars, fist class air and five star hotel suites, and I wouldn't have traded those experiences for anything. When you get too close to drugs and money at the same time it tends to intensify situations at hand. Guns, booze and partying don't mix very well...


Did this environment and lifestyle contribute to my disease? It's Possible! I suppose...

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18 comments:

  1. Great job! I'm so proud and thrilled that you are doing this.

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  2. Fight, fight, fight Ralph. Kick your pancreas' ass.

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    1. This is Cathy by the way. I am not sure why i am known as "Sweet Child o mine" (but i kinda like it).

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  3. Look out cancer! You don't know who your messing with!

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  4. I shall proudly join the journey with you. I support the spirit of you as you continue to live your life out loud and proud. You clearly are a fighter and I stand by your side along with your beloved, loyal family. I am still waiting for a ride in your car with you behind the wheel fast and furious. Love Jogi

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  5. We believe in you Ralph. Go and beat this cancer up. We know you can do it!!!

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  6. Ralph - You know I was with you on some of those wild journeys and now you are on one of your toughest ones...it's nothing you can't handle. Charr Lee and I are with you all the way on this one. Let's take this one to court and put the bad guy away, just like you've always done..love ya buddy

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  7. Keep fighting Ralph. We are pulling for you

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  8. Grab on real hard and stay as long as you can. Behind you, and on either side of you the old special agent group will be there, making fun and every now and then attempting to goose you as you bend over to grab that root...John Everett

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    1. They used to blame the that kind of logic on the effects of agent orange maybe it's now the effects of Saddam Desert sand

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  9. I am with you on your journey, my friend. May God bless you.

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  10. I can attest to the high stess environment in which you worked. I, along with other S/As tried to mitigate the danger, but you were too good. You were always readily accepted by the bad guys, and that made our job more difficult. You were, and still are the best UCA that I've ever had the pleasure of working with.

    Keep your chin up and, as JE said, grab on real hard. You've beat the odds before.

    Al R

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  11. Hang in there Ralph.. At times you may think you're in this alone, but there is always someone behind you thinking about you. We'll keep you in your prayers.

    Joe Rouleau

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    1. I always needed the buds that had my back.

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    2. hey Ralph, ...hum, what would Billy B do...??....chin up,...I do also remember those UC days, and share many of those memories with you....they still bring a smile to my face....hang in there...we all just do the best we can...(aka Jackie)

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